Sunday, June 15, 2008

My Father's Day Gift (Ian, Tom)

(I'm posting this on on both the CaringBridge and HendersonHome sites, for anyone keeping score. It's Father's Day, and I can do what I want.)

This Father's Day is perhaps one of the most difficult ones I've had since my father passed away nineteen years ago. On one hand, I feel a stab knowing that my little boy is struggling as he is. However, I focus on the fact that I have Ian with me right now, and I take the opportunity to make sure he knows that I love him, and that I'm proud of him. I started the day telling him that he is the reason I'm happy to be a father, and how proud I am of him.

And the truth is, I am incredibly proud of him. He is perhaps one of the most kind and giving individuals I have known, far beyond his years. Case in point: Ian was given a generous gift card to Target recently. He and Deb went there so that he could have some fun, picking out swimming toys. He wanted to buy Deb's groceries with it (she refused), but he was determined to buy my Father's Day gift, with his own gift money. This is not an isolated circumstance; it's how he is. We're in the middle of a multi-day Monopoly game. He currently owns 2/3 of the board, and has ten times the money that I do. (Mental note: get a financial advisor ASAP.) He wants to give me some of his money, just so that I can continue to play with him.

My son is grateful, too. Often, Ian will say "thank you" for things that most people take for granted. He has made it a point to thank restaurant employees for cooking his food. Ian will thank us for little things (Hot Wheels cars, a cookie, taking him out to eat) as well as larger things. He understands that he is not entitled to these things, and that they are gifts.

In many ways, I hope to be like him someday. He is my son, and he teaches me about how life should be lived. I can think of no greater Father's Day gift.

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